Have you ever found that you became somehow more productive when an INFJ entered your life? Or that you’d finally managed to get on top of a problem you’d been struggling with? You’re not exactly sure why, but you have the feeling that somehow the INFJ is behind all this. And you’d be right. INFJs don’t usually make obvious bids for power or seek out the limelight, but behind the scenes they exert a very strong influence. They are the quintessential power behind the throne.

INFJs are gentle and caring people, but this doesn’t meant they don’t have strong opinions. They can be very opinionated indeed – forceful even – and their Fe gives them a strong desire to bring about positive change in the world. They have an exceptional talent for understanding how any given scenario is likely to play out, and how to bring about the best possible outcome. They’re good at understanding exactly what people need to do to achieve their goals and become the best version of themselves. And they want to help them get there.

But INFJs also know that the best way to influence you isn’t by dictating. Their Fe is skilled at diplomacy, and so they’re more likely to influence by quietly planting the seeds of an idea without much fanfare. INFJs play the long game well, and they are patient enough to wait for people to come round – all the while gently dropping flattering and reassuring words into your ear that will make you more likely to listen. In the end, you’ll believe you thought of it yourself. INFJs don’t generally make demands and they don’t decree. Instead, they paint you a picture of just how good the new idea will be for you and your life.

INFJs are so good at this because of their Ni-Fe. This gives them an almost unrivalled ability to understand what you’re feeling, and to be able to anticipate how you will respond. So they can tailor what they say really effectively to chime with you. They know how to make you feel heard, and what is really motivating you deep down – even your deepest fears and insecurities . All this secret knowledge is bundled up and put to service in their campaign to influence you.

They do it in such a low-key way that you’ll barely notice it’s happening.

If this all sounds a little sinister, that’s because it is. But fear not – only seriously unhealthy INFJs would use this ability for nefarious ends. Instead, they use it for altruistic purposes, because they honestly want to help you. And they only go to these lengths for people they really care about. So if you are the target of this kind of INFJ mind-control, you should be flattered – it means they care about you! It has to be said that not everyone appreciates this kind of ‘help’, and some might find this attempt to influence more than a little annoying, in which case an INFJ needs to take note and dial it down. But if an INFJ has chosen you to be the recipient of this kind of mind-control, they can be a very powerful advocate to have on your side. Take heed of their advice – they’re often right.